Are you expecting again? This calls for a celebration!! But, it may not be the same for your older child.
You may be all excited about the news of your second pregnancy, but your kid may not feel the same as you. Till now he/she was enjoying all your love, care and attention, but now the thought of sharing everything from attention to toys may make him/her envious or even hate the siblings. To avoid these complications and enjoy the second pregnancy to the fullest, you need to prepare your older child for the new baby in a healthy way.
Image source: Naturalbabyprops
Here are a few tips to help you deal with your kids and guide them to adjust to the new kid:
SOME SUGGESTIONS FOR HELPING YOUR OLDER CHILD ADJUST TO THE NEW BABY
1. Explain why a sibling is important.
Instead of breaking your pregnancy news to your older kids out of the blue, the first step you need to take is, let your kids know the importance of having siblings. As a parent, explain your babies, why having a younger brother or sister is good for them. For example: Tell them if they have siblings, they may not be lonely and always have a partner to play with them in the backyard. Share examples and stories with them where the siblings together have fun.
2. Let them know you love them.
They need to know that you aren’t replacing them. Tell them that they will always be your babies and you will always love them. Appreciate them for their good behavior and don’t miss any chance to express your love for them. A simple “I LOVE YOU” from you may lighten up their day.
3. Show them their baby pictures & educate them about babies.
Let them know they too were small and you took care of them by feeding them, bathing them. And now, you will be doing the same for the new baby. Reassure them that they too received the same kind of attention and were loved equally. Educate your older children about babies, make them understand that babies are very fragile and thus they need to be very gentle with them.
Let them know that it may take some time for them to play with the babies in the backyard, but they can have fun by singing songs for baby and helping you with bathing, changing diapers etc.
4. Let them know their role.
Guide them with their changing role and challenges they may face during this period. Give them a clear sketch of their role after the baby arrives. Tell them that they will be a big brother or sister to the baby and guide their younger sister or brother in everything.
5. A two way communication is MUST.
It is very necessary to know what is going inside them. Talk to them about their feeling and insecurities. Explain to them that since babies are very small, they need extra attention and during this time they may feel left out or even would have to wait for you if you are busy with baby. Reassure them that you love them a lot and whenever they feel left out they must come and talk to you about their feelings.
Children may always find a bit difficulty in accepting their siblings, but preparing and guiding them in a right way can help them change and develop the sense of companionship. They can thus easily adapt to the changing atmosphere at home and you can enjoy every moment of parenting with them.
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The entry of a new baby can be both joyful and scary for a small child. Talk to the expecting sibling about the baby’s arrival, how their roles will change, what they will become responsible for, and how they will get a new playmate. Reassure them that their importance in their parents’ lives will not decrease, and you will always be there for them.
If you and your partner are planning to expand your family, you need to consider factors such as your physical, emotional, and financial readiness. Apart from consulting the doctor and preparing yourself for conception and the next round of parenting, you should also slowly prepare your older child or children for the new addition and the transition.
There is no right, wrong, or best age to give a child a sibling. No matter how small or big they are, they will have to get used to the changes around them. The dynamics of their family, their roles, and their responsibilities will all change. While very small children may not be mature enough to comprehend the effect of a new sibling, older children can, but will still need help and guidance.
Talk to your 1-year-old about how they are growing up and will soon be the older baby in the house, with more responsibilities. Tell them they will get a new playmate for life, and they can share their toys as well as the baby’s new toys. Show them, babies around you, and explain gently how the new baby will also be tiny and totally dependent for a few months.
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